The son of Skywalker lies!

er, sort of... sometimes... shit!! version 3.0 coming soon

PSU 5-7-05

PSU 6-25-05

CascadiaCon 9-4-05

The Skywalker Paradigm: An exercise in propaganda analysis

based on an original concept by Richard Eggers, expanded upon by Jack Eggers. Rigorously tested and upgraded enormously through many hours of discussion with Critter Jones. Additional support and material evidence provided by Andy Bergstrom, Sarah Linn, Ben Gitchel, Sam Roberts, Ralph Maronay IV, Josh Wendt, John Payne, and Phil Rose.


After reassessing everything in the movies laboriously, I have come to the conclusion that Darth Vader is the true hero of the original Star Wars trilogy. In this analysis, I generally consider only the movies themselves (Star Wars (A New Hope if you believe Lucas), Empire Strikes Back, and Return of the Jedi). For this presentation, we will be discussing them much in the same way the Thermians in Galaxy Quest viewed transmissions of Earth-based TV shows, as historical documents.

I have, at times, garnered some supporting info from the Expanded Universe of novels, comics, games, trading cards, and the many tech and art books on the subject. I delve a little into the new movies (Phantom Menace, Attack of the Clones, and Revenge of the Sith (or their more appropriate titles, 'Clone Wars' and 'Rise of the Sith')), but I tend to view them as a re-telling of history. A fabricated story told to the peoples of the galaxy after the events in the original trilogy.


While ardent enthusiasts may wish for more thoroughness, this site can get a bit involved for casual Star Wars fans. So here's a brief summary of the Skywalker Paradigm. Otherwise, the menu buttons on the side pave the way to the truth. From a certain point of view :)


**********UPDATES 7-23-07**********

Having bailed out of gigs with Illion Maybe's The DaSmurfi Code (sorry Illion) I haven't been appearing lately with the Paradigm. However, there is a bit of new material here: streaming --- PSU 5-7-05. This addresses a facet of the info even I have not looked at until now - Leia is Vader's step daughter and he is the male head of her royal family!! R2 is HIS droid, and Vader makes sure that the plans to the Death Star, controlled by the rouge Tarkin. When the rebel pilots converge on the Death Star, Vader leaves the base and ESCORTS none other than his own son and droid to the vulnerable spot!!! Vader is the master stratagist that saves the galaxy from a death dealing madman - TWICE!!!

**********UPDATES 2-6-07**********

Tuesday, Feb 6th!!! SOMEDAY LOUNGE downtown P-town, on 5th ave between Couch (say it with me: 'cooooch') and Davis!! Will we be able to pull this off? Who knows?! And what is it about Smurfs and Tuesdays? again, who knows?


**********UPDATES 1-14-07**********

This coming tuesday, Jan 16th at 7pm, myself and Illion Maybe will be appearing at The Know, 2026 NE Alberta in Portland, OR. So get your shit together and come see us!! It's free and it's in a bar, so you can pay money to get drunk publicly (holy shit!!!)


Star Wars---Empire Strikes Back---Return of the Jedi
Phantom Menace---Attack of the Clones---Revenge of the Sith